Family
A rollercoaster going up and down. In circles.
I still haven’t gotten off of my rollercoaster. The same one that I’ve been on for a while now. Letting myself go into the same plunges over and over again. Then getting on those highs. It’s getting really old. And I guess the only person I can blame is myself. I can slow down the cart. Readjust. Or just stop, get off, and jump onto the one that goes on and on, with no end in sight. Instead of my current one. My current Circular one.
I’ve recently been told, or, at least, this is what I get from it, I am not dateable because I am too ignorant about different things. I hate the fact that this really hurts. Because it’s actually a fear of mine. But, y’know what? F.U. I’m only 21 years old. I still have plenty of time to learn. To develop. To get to that place I need to be. What I really need to do is get away from these people that make me feel like crap all the time. The ones that take advantage and/or don’t take me seriously. I am sick of being the one always kicked aside.
I’m worried about Stephanie. I hope everything goes okay with her.
Now, on to a more positive, happy topic. I am loving class. I can’t wait until I actually start my job. Though, class is becoming a bit more stressful. It’s sudoku and word search and crossword all mixed up. Add about a pound of crack. And that is what I am doing right now. It’s great.
I’m already tired of doing my whining and pity party so I am going to go ahead and go.